Secret that remains as secret...

Some people keeps their secret to the grave..

but some people just can't stand to hold it inside...

i am once a person that live in life full of secrecy

full with doubts and pain

But there's a day comes when i feel so lifeless i choose to change.. 

The secrets in my life are no longer secret..

it's what i willing to let go..

i've open up to the people..even to the world..

i've give up every pride in me to let the pain go..

But those dark days.. i can never spill it out..

coz i am what those things made me..

though how much it change me through my looks nor my way..but it can never change my beliefs

But i now slowly learn that secret shouldn't meant to be burst out..

it's a matter of how you keep it and take it inside.. 

to have a patience and understanding to realize  the rationalism and try to make peace with it!

Yeah, people can only know what you feel but they can never know how you feel..

it's a pain that you'll just have to suffer yourself..

In the end.. you'll realize.. that's just what life is.. grow up!!

my perfect wish!!

Life is what makes the living.. it is subjective to anyone certain..

people say life's short.. make it your best and live to the fullest..

but what actually makes you feel satisfied and what scale can we look to for our life to be considered as satisfying??

of course there'd be no scale but just a list that i think people probably would agree so...

1) Happy family..
    to have a loving and understanding parents.. caring and helpful siblings.. warm atmosphere at home..

2) Good Job
    good job with a good salary is like a signature.. something that you and your parents can be proud of in your life..

3) A wonderful life partner
    here i would mean to say.. a good loving caring understandable responsible loyal husband...hoho..sounds absurd.. but well just follow the story line yeah?

4) beautiful memories
     happy memories that remains in your heart.. an achievement you made in your life or some sweet passed that brings the laugh and smile , something like those experience you can share with others.. it would be wonderful.

There you go..
the most listed journey in life i persume to acheive and i guess everybody does too right??
Well, perfect life is just a fantasy they say.. you need luck to have this life...
so i hope im the lucky person.. though i never been one (in my entire life..i never won that stupid lucky draw..)

All she knows...

Once again you're home alone 

Tears running from your eyes 

And I'm on the outside 

Knowing that you're all I want 

But I can't do anything 

I'm so helpless baby 

Everyday same old things 

So used to feelin pain 

Never had real love before 

And it ain't her fault 

She knows better but 

She can't help it 

Wanna tell her 

But would that be selfish 

How do you heal 

A heart that can't feel, it's broken 

His love is all she knows, all she knows, all she knows 

His love is all she knows, all she knows, all she knows 

You've been livin this way so long 

You don't know the difference 

And it's killing me 

Cause you can have so much more 

I'm the one your looking for 

But you close your eyes on me 

So you still can't see 

This is a song called- 'all she knows' by bruno mars...
captured my heart for the first time i listened to it.. yeah it did..
maybe the lyrics just stunnned me.. really stung me right in the face!

This song is a somewhat like a song that people listen to and makes them realize that something is really wrong in their life..
something that you could regret for your entire miserable life when you could've got but instead you ignored it and letting it go..
always know but kept on pretending not to know... believing with doubts.. and never sees what's in front of our eyes...

So..hmmmm.. it did opened my eyes for a minute there..
To hold on to someone that really holds on you...
then i would try my best not to let go...